August 19, 2011

When I stare into my sinful, selfish self, and at the end of that dark and lonely passage of reflection sits a little boy, afraid.

We are so afraid.  And that is why we sin.  We are afraid that our idols will fail us.  We suppress the truths that are written on our hearts, these truths that tell us that these are false gods who will not save us.  We are afraid that we will be found for who we are, as sinners, as frauds, as charlatans. as glory-thieves.  We are afraid that for all our struggles, climbing and clambering up for just a hint of meaning of existence, that we know that all of our struggles are for naught, that we can’t save ourselves.

We want heroes.  We desire to become our own heroes, but we are afraid that we might succeed.

And that is why courage is such a critical virtue.  At the testing point of our fears, the true nature of our struggles becomes evident.  THE struggle: the unveiling of His sons.  The true nature of the courage itself is revealed: the dying to ourselves, to our fears, to crucify our worries and to trust.  For to be courageous is to live a paradox, to risk death and injury to save our lives, to risk losing everything you have to gain everything there is.

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